Folk Off! Why you Should Holiday with your Parents

Beyond a certain age (right about your late teens) the thought of travelling with your parents fills the average person with a sense of dread.  The chance to holiday with friends on drunken adventures in Ibiza, backpacking around South East Asia or simply taking trips with a beloved understandably holds a far greater appeal than a trip with the old folks.  Even though, like you, I have experienced much of the above, I do count my Mum and Dad not only as my parents, but as two of my best friends and also two of my favourite travel buddies.

Mum and Dad (source – Pulped Travel)

I’m lucky, thanks to the great relationship I have with my parents, I have been able to travel extensively with them over the last few years; taking in trips to Mauritius, Turkey, Germany, Indonesia, Ireland, Spain and Greece.  This has been a conscious choice, occasionally shunning solo adventures so that I can spend time travelling with them.  And, that there is the main reason why I do it – I WANT to spend time with them, share the many and varied experiences that travel offers because as time ticks along and the years fly by, whilst we preoccupy ourselves with work and our the rest of our lives; I believe it is vital to spend time with your parents while you can, because one day when you look up from your busy life, they won’t be there anymore.  Sobering as this may sound, you have to view this as a chance; an opportunity to celebrate life (yours and theirs) and, ultimately, make some memories that last forever.

Travelling with your parents has some real upsides, but I won’t lie; it can be fraught with difficulties too.

THE BENEFITS
Memory Making – As I have said above, the whole point of travelling with my parents is to spend time in their company, making memories that will remain for the rest of yours and their lives.
Getting to Know You – Travelling with your Mum and Dad will open your eyes to who your parents really are on a number of levels.  As I have always said, you don’t really know a person until you travel with them.  Travel puts the individual into a situation that can really challenge people and allows them to demonstrate their character in surprising ways.  In addition to this, without the distractions of modern life, being away from it all allows you the opportunity to really talk to your parents, learn about their past, their future and, in turn, they get to find out more about you.  I have had some truly fascinating conversations with my parents on these trips away from home; with revelations about particular parts of our family history, their feelings about life, lots of useful advice and tender moments that in the fast pace of daily life at home are simply forgotten or not said.
The Generation Game – Travelling has changed enormously over the last couple of decades.  The arrival of the Internet has meant that how we travel has altered in many ways; often leaving some of the older generation a little behind the curve when it comes to making the most of adventures.  But, that doesn’t mean our parents can’t benefit from these advances.  On a recent trip to Krakow in southern Poland, one of my good friends told me of her amazement at how her nieces were able to guide their grandmother, mother and her to the most amazing restaurant in the city via a warren of pathways, back alleys and steps that took them through abandoned buildings and seemingly private courtyards, all of this thanks to their Internet research skills using TripAdvisor’s restaurant reviews function to locate this hidden gem.  My parents themselves were blown away at how I could check us all in and receive our electronic boarding pass for the next ferry journey on our Greek island hopping trip all from the comfort of the balcony in our apartment.  This role reversal allows your parents to now take the back seat and enjoy the ride, for a change, and let the young ‘uns take the lead in negotiating the destination!
A Voyage of Discovery – One of the best things about travelling with anyone, let alone your parents, is the discoveries you make along the way; whether that be incredible scenery, exciting cultures or fantastic foreign foods.  It can be an eye-opening experience.  I remember fondly my parents (pleasant) shock at experiencing South East Asia for the first time, on our trip to Bali, as mopeds zoomed by, the prices were inconceivably low and the people some of the friendliest they had ever encountered on their travels.  And, only last year, my Dad and I were able to teach my Mum how to read Greek, a feat she never thought possible prior to the trip!
Money – My parents are ridiculously generous when we travel together.  From purchasing the coffees at the airport to offering to pay for the car hire for a couple of days, the Euros or Indonesian Rupiah are pressed into my palm and are almost always followed by either, “we want to enjoy our money with you” or “well, we can’t take it with us!”  I really appreciate it and do try to ‘fight back’ against it by offering to pay whenever I get the chance…especially when they’re too slow to furnish me with a stack of coins.

THE DRAWBACKS
The Go Slow – Travelling with your parents, might mean you have to slow the pace down a bit to suit their needs.  Giving your folks a heads up about aspects of the journey can speed things up a bit.  Getting on and off the boats on our Greek island hopping trip was made all that much easier when my parents knew which side to get off, to get their luggage as swiftly as possible and to meet up by the man selling watermelons to thirsty tourists on the harbourside!  It worked a treat!  Nevertheless, I would suggest you see these kinds of trips as a chance to slow your own pace of travel down; getting in to the rhythm of travel where you walk that bit slower, savouring the sights, smells and sounds a little more than you might if you were travelling alone or with friends.
A Voyage of Discovery – One of the worst things about travelling with your parents is the discoveries you make along the way; whether that be the disappointing scenery you have led them to, the strange cultures they’re not used to or the fiery foreign foods they have never heard of.  Watching my parents battling through their spectacles, whilst reading the menu by torchlight in a restaurant in Bali coupled with the concerns my parents sometimes have about ‘exotic’ foods brought to the fore their northern British roots; one that is more used to a less adventurous diet than what was presented to them, but thankfully I can happily report the delights of Indonesian cuisine and Greek souvlaki have not passed them by and they lapped it up!

Torchlight Dinner (source – Pulped Travel)

The Compromises – You want to hit that great bar.  They want to hit their head against their pillow.  There have been moments where I have thought, I’m a fully grown man travelling with my parents and having looked at the scene around me almost wished I was with a group of friends or a loved one, but I look back at the two people I’m with and think how lucky I am to have this chance to share this experience with them.  Besides, there’s always room for those kind of travels on other trips!

PULPED TRAVEL’S GUIDE TO TRAVELLING WITH YOUR PARENTS
GROUND RULES – Establish some simple ground rules.  The main one, I would suggest is to not travel in each other’s pockets.  You are inevitably going to need a breather from each other, so ensure it is clear from the start that if either yourself or your parents want a morning, afternoon or day to themselves, so be it!  You will only resent each other and the trip if there isn’t a consensus on what to do, where to go or what to eat.  Simply do what you want to do and if you need to take time apart – take it; you are adults after all.  You’ll return even more excited at the prospect of helping them look for their sunglasses they’ve misplaced again!
KITTY – To avoid arguments (and unnecessary stress) about money whilst travelling with your parents, set up a kitty; where you all contribute the same amount of cash to be used for expenditure on food, drinks, transport, accommodation etc that the whole group is a part of.  This can be topped up if it runs low and any purchases beyond those mentioned previously, such as a souvenir or personal purchase can be taken from that person’s own wallet or purse.  That way, no-one ends up paying for something they didn’t want to or intend to buy and means that the group expenditure is pretty much equal.
CAPTURE THE MOMENT – Take lots of photos and capture some video too.  You will have a great time looking back at them when you return and as the years pass by, I am certain you will come to treasure the snaps and footage of the people you cherish dearly.  By the way, photographs from your travels, placed in a beautiful frame make for an excelllent birthday, anniversary or Christmas gift for your parents.  My Mum always wells up with tears of joy when I give her a framed family photo!

A framer! Mum and Dad enjoying the sunset at Seminyak on the Indonesian island of Bali (source – Pulped Travel)

I wish you an amazing trip with your parents (or even any older member of your family)!  I promise, you won’t regret it!

Feel free to please comment below with your experiences of travelling with your parents!